Am’I’Zoned acquires “Flopkart,” says “Snoopdeal’s next!”

sharkIt came as a surprise to all, when Mr. Monopoly Desai, Managing Director of Am’I’Zoned India announced the acquisition deal with Mr. Baniya Bansal, Co-founder of “Flopkart”.  Am’I’Zoned lived up to its notorious reputation of being the big shark in the e-commerce ocean, and has also sent a strong message to the world  that “Snoopdeal’s next!” Flopkart, which recently revamped its marketing strategy from the old traditional methodologies of “customer success” to new unconventional methodologies of “customer distress”, hails this acquisition as a great milestone.

Mr. Baniya released a statement saying, “Am’I’Zoned had promised us 2 years of enjoyment period, in which we have been able to secure my next 5 generations financially. Now we should let them do what they do best i.e. Eat other businesses.” We also approached the CEO of Meantra.com about his thoughts on being acquired by someone who just got acquired themselves. He was startled, “I am so confused. Who’s my reporting manager now? I am suffering from Identity crisis.”

The most affected employees are the web spy agents recruited by Flopkart to keep a tap on the price list of the commodities being sold on Am’I’Zoned. They were responsible to report the pricing to Flopkart, which would then price the same commodity at a rupee cheaper. After the acquisition, all these agents land jobless. However, all the employees from the customer support team of Flopkart are preparing for the auditions of the next season of Rowdies.

Customers have mixed reviews about the acquisition. There are many customers who have long pending orders yet to be delivered. They are confused if the delay is because of the usual delays that Flopkart is proud of or is it because of the confusion after acquisition.

Our correspondents also approached the Mr. Kunal Behal, CEO of Snoopdeal, to ask if he felt intimidated with the happenings. He said, “For as long as possible, Bachate Raho!”

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My article also published in the Faking News: http://my.fakingnews.firstpost.com/2014/09/11/amazon-acquires-flipkart-says-snapdeal-is-next/ 

Disclaimer: Please don’t make your own ideas. This is just a satire. No offence is meant to any individual or organization.But what ever is written could soon become reality.

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